Operation Tubetop

Since I live in this great little country, I thought I would tell y'all about how the Austrians get down on New Year's Eve. Now, I have spent some incredible Eves around the world in awesome places. I think one of the best ones was standing at Red Square for Y2K. We were on CNN and I was all like "wow, I am coming across so mature and awesome! Let me just swig this Russian sparkling wine right out of the bottle and yell into the camera. Pure class". Another time I spent it on the top of the CN tower - that was a little disappointing because in fact, we were too high up to actually see the fireworks in their full glory. Instead, it just looked like little flashes of lights down way below. One year I danced with a Saudi prince at a Hilton hotel - I was 9. When I was a teenager and we were living in Wien, my dad took my sister and me to one of his acquaintance's villas in the 18th district. It was a majestic place and everybody was dressed up in black tie and gowns

What a year. What a stressful, difficult year. But to be fair, there was definitely some awesomeness as well. The terrible parts were mostly about the Kid and the daycare and the multiple diagnosiseseses and the judging. I have never been so stressed out in my life but I feel like it truly made me stronger and made me realize that I will do everything in my power to make sure the Kid has a great childhood. I need a drink. This year we also lost my cousin which was a shock and still is. I had 4 months off this year and was able to get a lot of painting and organizing done but yet it was difficult not knowing if I would truly get another contract and if that contract would be a little bit more permanent. Through all of the craziness, there was also a lot of awesomeness; Bristol hotel stay and upgrade, great date nights, fun nights out, ball visit, seeing and meeting Margaret Cho, two visits to Berlin, a trip to Greece, lots of tennis in the summer, a post featured on Just Say Jenn,

This week won't be low carb but more of a portion control week. I'm not in the mood to consume blocks of cheese and pounds of bacon this week. I will be using my portion plate that arrived the other week. When I took it out of the box and saw the serving size for pasta, I almost cried and I think I might have checked the back to see if I had mistakenly ordered the child's version Then I really cried. Anywho. Here is my week plan. Monday B: Spinach fruit smoothie L: Energy bar or salad S: Swedish cracker or Wheat Thins D: Tomato soup and chik patties with an English muffin Tuesday B: Spinach fruit smoothie L: Energy bar or salad S: Swedish cracker or Wheat Thins D: Chicken and red pepper pizza and salad and CHAMPAGNE! Happy New Year!!! Wednesday B: Spinach fruit smoothie L: Energy bar or salad S: Swedish cracker or Wheat Thins D: Veg wrap Thursday B: Spinach fruit smoothie L: Energy bar or salad S: Swedish cracker or Wheat Thins D: English muffin

The Kid and I are 6 days apart birthday wise. I told the Husband years ago that I wanted a kid by the time I was 30. Six days after turning 30, I had the Kid. I told you I like to plan. My birthday is February 11th (I like sparkly things and fabric!) and the Kid's is on February 17th. We actually got to choose the date and yes, he shares a birthday with Paris Hilton. Kid, I share one with Sarah Palin so suck it up cupcake. Anyway, last year I didn't do anything for my birthday. I was not in the mood to celebrate and I didn't realize that I was coming down with bronchitis. The following weekend we attended a ball and I was high on cough syrup and the next day we hosted the Kid's pirate themed second birthday of which I have no recollection of. I ended up going to the doctor the next day and she told me I came right in time- it was about to turn into pneumonia. Fun February!  So this birthday (my 33rd), I want to do something big and fun. There is a lot to celebra

I can't believe that it is my last day of my mini holiday. It has been so great spending so much time with the Kid. I am just grateful that the Husband is home next week so that he has one more week without the daycare. I go back to work on Monday and then have a half day on Tuesday, Wednesday is off and then I work Thursday and Friday. Not so bad, but still, insert childish voice, I don't wanna ! To be honest, I really like my job and my co-workers so it really isn't a chore to go, I just don't want to put on a bra. In other news, I have to plan our New Year's Eve dinner. I'm leading towards homemade chicken and red pepper pizza (otherwise known as: using crap we already have in the kitchen). Probably paired with a salad and of course champagne. Gah! Just got back from the gym and nobody was there to open it. NOT HAPPY! NOT FUN GOING OUTSIDE ON A WINTER MORNING AT 5:55. MAD! So I decided to do some squats at home and now am back in my pjs. I am now on day 2

I've talked about The Secret before as well as positive thinking. I read the book a few years ago and since then, every year, I make a new vision board - but in journal form. A vision board is kind of like a visual wish list and I love it. You might not believe in the "universe providing" or "positive attracts positive" but I truly believe that anything that gets me to a better mental state is worth investing in. This year has been one of my darkest years and I'm not sure I would have handled it as well as I did if I wasn't so positive. I've cut out a lot of negativity in my life (and I need to do some more) and I have found that for the most part I am happier. And now, as the year comes to an end, it is time to make a new journal. To make one, I think about all I want for the upcoming year. It can be anything - a waistline would be nice. Then I cut out pictures and tape them into a notebook and write what I want. It's cathartic and the Husban

Yesterday was the day of spending gift certificates. After my workout and my smoothie and my feelings of smugness, I put on my spackle and headed to H and M. I decided to use up the rest of an old gift certificate and buy myself some new workout clothes. I'm kind of addicted to workout clothes and I'm not sure why. My gym is the poor man's John Harris and there is no need to look good at 6 in the morning but yet, I like to wear cute gym wear. I bought a long sleeved hot pink tee and a short sleeved grey tee and yoga pants. They also sold gym water bottles that were cute so I bought one of those too. And when I got home, I filled it up with sliced lemons and water and the smugness stunk up the place. An hour later I headed to Peek and Cloppenburg to use my new gift certificate. The place was a madhouse and I wanted to yell "WHY ARE YOU ALL SHOPPING HERE RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT?!?!" I headed to the third floor for the purses (pro shopper observation: the mens wear is

Ok, I'm ready! It's 5:45 a.m. Heading to the gym in 10 minutes. I feel refreshingly refreshed and ready to go. Maybe it is the fact that the Kid finally slept through the night (the last couple of nights have been hellish). Or maybe it is the fact that I am super excited to clean out my system. Yesterday I went out with a bang! After my workout, I will come home and shower, then run to the grocery store for smoothie ingredients: spinach, berries, banana and fat free yoghurt. I feel pretty damn smug that I'm starting on December 27th. I would like to say it is willpower but it really isn't. It's more about the incredible discomfort I have been in in the last few days. I obviously have some intolerance to something but that would take a lot of research and ain't nobody got time for that! Today I am meeting up with one of my oldest and dearest friends. We met when we were 12 when I first moved to Vienna and I love that 20 years later, we can still hang and list

I think I need to have my stomache pumped. I'm dying. It's been a few days of over the top eating and I'm paying for it. In a way I am grateful for my gluttony because tomorrow I will be ready for smoothies and detox. Christmas Eve involved a half day of work, then a drink with a friend then a visit to the in laws. The Kid was over stimulated so for 2 hours I chased him around in heels and then I made an executive decision and decided to take him home. The Husband stayed longer to spend some more time with his parental units and sister. Once the Kid and I got home, I tossed him into bed, put on my Christmas pj's and popped open some wine and enjoyed the silence. The Husband came home a couple of hours later and we headed to bed. My in laws were super generous again this year - I got gift certificates to Peek and Clopenburg and Calzedonia. Tomorrow, I shall most likely spend them ALL! SPEND ALL THE MONEYS! In the morning I put the Kid in his new pyjamas and he looked a

Happy Christmas Eve!!! Man, it was hard to get up this morning and put on my spackle. I just wanted to stay on the couch and watch Christmas cartoons and bathe in eggnog. At least it is only a half day at work today. As of 1, I am outie and then I am meeting a friend for our traditional Christmas Eve drink. Then I will head home and get changed and then around 4:30 we will head to the In-laws. We'll open gifts, eat dinner and then head back home when the Kid starts to have a sensory overload. The Husband and I will watch some TV, drink some wine and then sleep the sleep of champions, until 5:30 a.m. when the Kid will start yelling for milk. One of us will give the Kid milk and then we will sleep the sleep of champions until 7 a.m. I will make mimosas for the Husband and I and then make German oven pancakes and wear p.j.'s. New Christmas Day tradition - p.j.'s. The Kid got a pair, I bought myself a pair and the Husband will get his pair tonight and will no doubt kvetch and

Holy crap! It is the 23rd of December and all through the house, one creature was stirring and shouting out lists of things that need to get purchased before tomorrow. The Husband is off for two weeks and is therefore in charge of all things at home. He decided to take the Kid to daycare so he could "get some last minute shopping" - translation: I have to match the number of gifts you bought me lest I end up sleeping on the sofa on the 25th. I also asked the Husband to buy: wine, champagne, orange juice and toilet paper. One of these is not like the other. I also took a picture of the living room and said to the Husband "let's keep it like this so that when I come home, I don't kill you". I cleaned a lot over the weekend because I plan to be comatose on the 25th. On the 26th we have friends coming over but at least most of the "deep" cleaning has been done. Yesterday I met up with a friend, who is back in Wien for a visit, for lunch and then we

Last night the Husband and I had an awesome and very much needed date night. Around noon the Husband brought the Kid to the in laws. It was hard to say 'bye' to the Kid since he has been going through some serious seperation anxiety recently. That's why I am so looking forward to the 5 days I will have off as of Tuesday afternoon because that will give the Kid the chance to get really really sick of me. After the Husband and Kid headed off, I did some last minute shopping (I am officially done with all my Christmas shopping! Holla!) and checked my list twice to make sure we have all the food needed for 2.5 days when the shops are closed. I also cleaned and did laundry and strung up one more strand of lights. Our apartment? Christmas tackiness to the extreme. Awesome! The Husband came home a couple of hours later and took a nap and I put on a face mask and put my hair in curlers and pretty much was a giggly idiot in anticipation. Around 5 we headed to the Rathaus Christm

We were supposed to go on our date night tonight. The Mother in Law was going to take the Kid for the night and the Husband and I were going to hit the Rathaus to buy ornaments and then go to the casino to make lots of money. But she is feeling under the weather so we will do it tomorrow night. I was pretty pumped to go this evening but after I made sure the Husband knew I was disappointed, I realized that it is probably better to go tomorrow. Plus, I was able to rope him in to watching  National Lampoons Christmas Vacation tonight! One of my all-time Christmas films. Sparky! Tomorrow is probably better for our date night because that will give me the opportunity to shave and wear cuter shoes. Plus, I am pretty tired after this busy week. Here are the week's stats: Gym visits: 4 (I was going to go this morning but sitting on my sofa reading about the Kardashians wrapped in a fake fur throw seemed like a better idea) Pounds lost: 1.5 (frustrated but still feeling motivated) Pl

Today I was on daycare duty - blech. I hate doing it because it is emotionally hard and I know he has been difficult recently and I hate the thought of bringing him to a place where they almost "dread" having him there. He didn't want to go in so I had to do the old fireman carry over the shoulder and launch him over the baby gate while he cried. Kid, you're killing me, here. The only positive is that tomorrow is the last time this year that I have to take him and the great thing is, is that he will only have 4 more days in January. I wish he could comprehend that. I wish we could just get started at the Montessori and I can start wearing Birkenstocks (ha ha. Like that would ever happen). January is going to be an incredibly difficult month. I need to take at least a week or two of half days for his "integration" time starting January 13th. I'll pretty much bring him there at 8:30, then sit with him for an hour: it is up to him to make the decision to go

Holy moly, deck the halls! I keep getting mini Christmas moods and then they are annihilated by crazy work. So after today, it is full steam ahead and I am going to enjoy it to the max! Hollah! Holly? Last night the Husband was out and I was looking forward to a silent night (get it, yeah). I put the Kid to bed at 7:30 and made some dinner. The Kid yelled out "mommy!" and I assumed he wanted more milk. I went in and he was standing in his crib and I asked him "Do you want more milk?" and he replied "bitte" and so I went and got him a new bottle. When I got back, the bugger was on the other side of the crib with a look of triumph. We are so incredibly screwed. I let him lie down on the sofa and I was like "See? You ain't missing anything. Look, Mommy's putting on a face mask. Boo-oring". When he still didn't go back to his crib, I brought him to our bed where he sighed and looked up at the ceiling. So I turned to him and said "T

I don't think I have posted this magical recipe before. It is pretty sinful but still low carb. I made a huge batch on Saturday because I knew I would be hurting on Sunday and it would be a good way to stop mindless carb eating. This recipe uses halloumi; as I was cooking up a batch, the Kid walked into the kitchen and grabbed a plate of fried halloumi off the counter and took it to the sofa. I called out to him that he might be disappointed. I waited patiently and waited for the exaggerated gagging and loud "BLECH", usually reserved for carrots and his week old cookies. Instead he declared "MMMMMM!!" and proceeded to eat half a plate. I have to say, I was kind of impressed. He also loved the finished product and kept saying "Moooooorrreeee lasagaga". The Kid knows the way to my heart. So this is how I make my low carb lasagna; all the ingredients in a normal lasagna are the same except instead of noodles, use cooked halloumi. It holds its shape fair

The Kid is still sick. He's snuggly and clingy and I feel so bad for him. I also feel sorry for my elastic waist jeans that have to put up with his constant tugging. His cough is a lot better but he had a freak out this morning and we decided to keep him home one more day. I also think that I am so mentally done with the daycare that every day less that he can spend there is good (in my opinion). This week is going to be a bit frantic with last minute grocery shopping and watching Christmas films and doing normal things. It is pretty busy at work so that makes the days fly by. Tonight I am seeing a friend in a play reading (but I will make it an early night). On Wednesday a friend is coming by for some wine and on Thursday is the office Christmas party. I won't stay long for that since there are office supplies and wine and it will just not be a good thing. I continue to low carb and am down 5.5 pounds and I hit the gym this morning, but I was so tired that I could only face

Wellity wellity wellity... This week was pretty good. Ok, a lot of it was overshadowed by anticipation for the appointment last night, but otherwise, a decent week. I am glad that the appointment is over and that I can look forward to an awesome weekend. The Kid will stay home again today (thank you jeebus for the mother in law! - she leaves for three months as of January, so Kid, you better stay healthy!). Tomorrow evening is our girls traditional annual Christmas which involves dinner, drinking a lot and exchanging gifts. Can't wait! In other news, I hit the gym 5 times this week! Atta girl! Monday, Tuesday and Thursday I worked on the crosstrainer for 30 minutes and Tuesday I did 15 minutes on the bike and then for the other 15 minutes, did leg presses and arm butterfly thingies (official name). This morning I did 10 minutes on the bike, then the arm things, then leg presses, then the arm things again and then tried out a new machine for stomach muscles. I am always a little i

So tonight was our first visit to the "centre". All day I was on edge and just ready to get through it. At 4:15 I ran home, changed the Kid, threw provisions into his carriage, dressed him in a bazillion layers and headed out. The poor Kid was a coughing mess but I pretty much was like "No fever? Let's go!" He was in high spirits until we got to the last Ubahn stop and exited and he decided he wanted to walk. Then he got pissed we wouldn't let him stand on the tram tracks and then threw himself on the ground. That was awesome during rush hour pedestrian traffic. I finally bribed him with a cookie and we walked on to the centre. We arrived with a few minutes to spare and the Kid yelled at me to take off his shoes and he headed to the toys and started playing. Nobody was in the waiting room - no receptionist, nada. I turned to the Husband and whispered "what is the public one like?!?" Snob life 4 eva. Snob shocked at lack of personnel. Finally at 6:1

Last night I wrapped and I wrapped. And the Kid and I coughed and coughed. I have a cold but it isn't too bad, yet. The Kid is home today but when I get back from work tonight, I'm bundling him up and we are heading to our first session to get him "diagnosed". I will just be happy to have all this behind us. It is exhausting and heart wrenching. Me no likey! So that is what's happening today. But enough of that! Here's what I have bought the Husband for Christmas and since he doesn't read this blog, I feel safe writing it out here. Men are often hard to shop for unless they have a hobby. The Husband's hobby is me so I have to think long and hard about what to get him. So here it is (and I might get a couple of more things over the weekend): Men's shirt Socks (he loves socks) Gloves that can be used on a smart phone Big Bass Fishing Wii game A Wii virtual fishing rod thingy 2 Bear Grylls DVD's A tablet (not a fancy schmancy one - not u

OMG! 2 weeks to go! I need to get in the spirit and stat. Tonight the Husband is out for his company Christmas party and our nanny has the day off so I have to pick the Kid up from daycare. I'm looking forward to some one on one time with him this evening, there will most likely be a triple viewing of Donald Duck and some "choo choo" playing. ( Editor's note: husband just called and said the Kid is sick. The Husband is picking up the Kid but I will be rushing home in an hour to take over- I write my posts in the morning but like to keep it in "real-time" )  Once he is in bed, I'm popping Elf into the player and wrapping presents. I was going to have soup for dinner but instead I am making a beef taco bake. And the good news: I'm down 4 pounds! Woot! So since we are speeding towards Christmas, I thought I would write up a helpful little list of things you should buy to be prepared because I am a helpful, smug person (this really applies to peeps who

Last night the Husband and I had a nice quiet dinner at the table. We had put the Kid to bed like we usually do and looked forward to watching the Millionen show. We are wild! About an hour after bedtime the Kid shouted for me... His call of distress goes "MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY (pause) Daddy?" so I went in and he roped me into a diaper change. After changing him, he saw his chance to escape and clung to me like syphillis to a wh... oh you know what I mean. Anyway, I let him sit on the sofa to watch a 27 year old student win a million euros. Then we tried to bring him back to his crib. "NEIN". Then he came to our bed for a few minutes but changed up his mind and decided to run around the apartment in the dark. Nothing is scarier than not knowing where your toddler is hiding in the dark. It was like a scene from Chucky. Jerk even pulled the chord on his musical bear so that creepy music could be my soundtrack as I walked around li

We went yesterday to check out the possible new daycare. The woman was amazing to open on a Sunday for us and she was so incredibly nice and she has been an incredible support this past week and a half. The Kid seemed to love the place and they have a padded room for recess which is awesome. I wish I could have a padded room (and insert jokes here). We spent over an hour talking as the Kid ran around. I was sending him telepathic messages to try and look intelligent and brilliant. Instead, he ignored my pleas and ran against a wall. Hey, it was padded! Awesome! After the long talk I asked if she would be willing to have the Kid at her school and she said yes. So it looks like we will start January 13th. Well, the first couple of weeks we will need to bring him in for just an hour or so so that he can adjust- they leave it up to the Kid to decide. I have a feeling that within the first 10 minutes on the first day, he will be running in and playing. It was so nice to finally sit down w

Well, I've been avoiding it for the last few weeks, dare I say months. I would look at it and say "I don't need you! You don't control me! Now where are my elastic pants?" That damn scale has been wedged under the bathroom sink and collecting dust. I've been avoiding buttoned pants and tight shirts and been lying to myself. I've been stress eating and snacking and pretty much been subscribing to chocolate and bagel chips in lieu of therapy. By avoiding the scale, I could avoid reality. But enough was enough and this morning I went on the scale and sweet mother moley, I can't believe how much I have gained. I'm not panicked, I'm not mental, I am surprisingly calm. I needed a kick in the groin and I got it. And now it is time for some good and clean eating. No more bread or potatoes or sugar for a while. More veg, protein and movement. It is time. Yeah, yeah, it's the holiday season, but you know what? The holiday truly isn't only about

I woke up at 5:20 and couldn't go back to sleep. I decided to get up and make some coffee and turn on the tree. I love sitting in the dark with the tree on. As a kid, my dad would turn on the tree in the morning and it was always such a great sight. On the weekends I would spend hours lying under the tree, looking up at the branches and lights. Try it one time, it's almost magical, well, depending on how much Advil you take. The Kid broke an ornament yesterday afternoon. I missed the excitement but apparently the Kid was mega upset which is good. Feelings are good. You may find it odd that I am happy to see my kid show emotion, ie. regret, but trust me, it is a very very good thing. The other day he was upset that he wasn't allowed to watch cartoons. So he took the remote control from me and yelled "No TV!" (I guess in his mind, if he doesn't get to watch what he wants, nobody gets to watch what they want. Stay tuned for the Lifetime drama starring Eddie Cib

Woot woot! Friday! This week was a bazillion times better than last week because, oh, I don't know... maybe there was no me crying buckets of tears. Next week I will be a bundle of nerves waiting for the 12th when we visit the diagnosis centre. I just have to keep focusing on the positive - I have fabulous shoes. The last three days have been super busy and stressful at work so the evenings have pretty much been me on the sofa for about 30 minutes after dinner and then me in bed, asleep by 9. I'm still waiting for my kind of exciting news to happen. Not sure if it will actually happen but I am waiting patiently for it. Fingers crossed. OPTIMISM OR BUST! Tomorrow is the Kid's Christmas show thing but I really don't feel like going. I'm pretty much done with the daycare. On Sunday we are going to visit the possible new daycare and fingers crossed that it is awesome and that the Husband agrees that the change would be good. This December will be a twitchy one but I n

The world has lost one of the most incredible people to have walked this Earth. A man of such integrity and love. My heart hurts at the news that Nelson Mandela has passed. So much of my childhood was spent watching the rise of this incredible man. You might not believe in auras but I do. You could see his. He was a man that could have chosen hate after serving so many years in prison. He didn't. He chose love. He loved his fellow man and he loved his country. He was an example of what every person should strive to be - to love and to make a change. We might think we have come a long way in the fight for equality, but we are not there yet. Terms like "reverse racism" get me twitchy. I will never know what it is like to be black. I can't even begin to imagine what life would be like if I wasn't a chubby white girl. To even pretend to know what it feels like to be judged by the colour of my skin would be ridiculous and a slap in the face to every person who has be

Bridget Jones may not be a Christmas film but it is to me. I have seen it a bazillion times and still love it. The books were good (I will mention the third one later on) and the films were great. Well, the first one was incredible, the second one, not as much... but still good. The fight scene by the fountain was quite possibly one of the best scenes of all time and therefore brought the second film up to a better standing. Why oh why do I love Bridget Jones so much? Well, because, she is incredibly relatable. I think so many of us have been in situations where we see how Bridget Jones reacts and think, "yes, totally me". She is the average, yet funny and endearing, girl next girl and she gets the guy.. well, guys. I love so many aspects of the film and here are some of the reasons why: This doesn't need much of an explanation but let's just say that this is me most of the weekend. Finally a film where the heroine isn't wearing Juicy Couture and looking fab

I am getting ready for the new year already! I'm eating ok so far this month but I will go full-(healthy) hog come January. And, like anything I do, Mommy has to plan. I am hoping to get my smoothie maker at Christmas. And with a gift certificate I will most likely get from the Mother in Law, I will be buying new gym wear. I also am going to make myself a new workout routine to change it up a bit and try to go at least one weekend day as well. Dream big, aim far, you can do it! Let's aim for January 2nd because I have a feeling January 1st will be a day of bloody Mary's and pancakes. I also found this thing on Pinterest and I am thinking this will be perfect for January. If you listen very very carefully, you might hear the sound of me groaning every time I squat. Like a seashell missing the ocean... I also bought this thing. Now before you judge me for spending 10 euros on a plastic plate, oh what the hell, go ahead and judge me... But I think this will be a very go

Oh dear lord! I lost a couple of days last week so I need to up da planning, stat! I still have some more gifts to buy. I thought I would be done by now... but, you know, life. I have made my final list that I hope to get through by the end of the week. The Husband is supposed to take care of his side of the family but I might get a couple of things for him so that he can focus on buying stuff for me. He responded to my e-mail from yesterday... the one with my list of gifts. He was like "thanks for the list dear, I also have some ideas". Cue me screaming "NOOOOO!!! STICK TO THE LIST!" Watch this space and see if it will indeed be a very merry Christmas or not. As of tomorrow we have 3 weeks to go. That is not much time to pull together the Martha Christmas I am imagining. In this Martha Christmas I am wearing cable knit and thigh high chunky socks and sitting on the sofa drinking calorie and fat free eggnog (it's my vision, let me have discovered a calorie and