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Tuesday, 30 June 2015

June Wrap Up

Wellity wellity. It is the last day in June. Tomorrow is Canada Day and I will be feeling a little home sick and a little in the mood for Ice Caps and poutine. I am going to a bbq for an editorial meeting in the evening and I have asked people to learn the Canadian national anthem because Canada RULES!
So much win in this picture!
I cannot believe that this month is coming to a close. I thought May was wild! June, you done good, Kid. You done good. So let's recap the insanity that was June.

Partay at Sekt Comptoir and Heuer: This was a lovely evening, meeting awesome new people and enjoying buckets of sparkling wine.

Summerstage: I had a great night out with a friend and we had pizza and we had our first bowle of the season! Huzzah!

Brickmakers: Finally got to try this restaurant out. There is something magical about their mac and cheese. Something magical indeed.

Art show: This was a lot of fun. I had beer, looked at great work, and then sat outside on the ground on the Wienzeile (linke one I think) and enjoyed the summer evening... as well as discovering there is a disturbing man who drives a cool car with a huge teddy bear in the passenger seat. That was not a nice thing to learn.

BBQ in Burgenland: This had so many wins. The Kid was amazing the whole day and we really stepped outside of our comfort zone and it was worth it. And what is better than a bbq on a hot summer day?

Visiting a publishing firm: Ok, so maybe I am not being published ((yet) (I am also optimistic)) but walking into a place that births books is pretty awesome. It's like me walking into Chanel or Dior. Oh the future possibilities!

Der Fuchs und Die Trauben: Yay! I went twice this month! One time to meet up with my oldest friend's sister and another to meet up with online friends and real life friend and now online friend is real life friend. The world is a magical place.

Concordia Ball: This was such a fun and surreal night. Getting all fancy and then getting plastered is about as Viennese as you can get. Deciding to go for a run at 4 in the morning after said ball, however, is not.

Fundraiser: I was such a nervous wreck before this event. Fears included: nobody showing up; making under 100 euros, making a small speech in front of my peers.. etc. But it turned out so so so well and we raised 1,500 euros which is the most incredible thing ever. And to have so much support from so many wonderful people was incredible! I am lucky to call so many of you friends and now I am getting all teary eyed... moving on. Oh, and I am so hosting this again next year!

AIS Not my class reunion: This involved a visit to Lukas bar and a visit to Lutz bar and it was so amazing to meet up with people and realize that the majority of us alumni are pretty awesome. There I said it. We are amazing. No, but in all honesty, I am glad that I went because it brought a strange sense of closure to my teenage years in Vienna.

Volksoper: This was awesome and so much fun! And because I am snob, I enjoyed most the fancy seats we got and of course the performance. Culture: I has it.

Walks with the Kid: This is a new tradition and I adore it. I strap him into his stroller and we walk down to Margaretenplatz and stop for a chocolate croissant. So technically I am turning him into veal. And addendum: The Kid's words are cropping up again and I could not be happier!

So July is coming up and I sadly have a feeling it won't be as spectacular as May and June. Well, my parental units are coming this weekend so that will be fantastic.. but after that.. nada really planned. If you have been invited to something fancy and you need a date, give me a call. I can't promise to behave but I will definitely make you laugh at some point of the evening. Or cringe. Or make you pretend you don't know me. But I will buy your drinks. So there you have it, June - a fantastic month of so much awesomeness (I even missed a couple of things I did because I was starting to look like Lindsay Lohan). Bye, June.

Monday, 29 June 2015

Fun Fun Weekend

It is Monday again and it is hard to wake up. There is still a chill in the air which makes it feel Fall-like which I usually love but, you know, in September. It was another crazy weekend! The last few weeks have been wild so I am looking forward to slowing down... kind of. This week will not be as wild as weeks past: no balls, no parties, no operas, no clubs. All that is on the schedule this week is a bbq editorial meeting on Wednesday and something intellectual called Parallax on Thursday at MQ which will most likely be over my head and I will be thinking to myself  "Do potatoes bounce?" and then followed by a visit to the Freihausviertel fest afterwards. On Friday my parents are coming for the weekend which will be great! They are moving back to Canada so we won't see them for a long time. Sad.

Re: this past weekend: Friday after work, I met a friend for a quick drink and then headed home to make dinner and get the Kid ready for bed. At 9 I headed to the Lutz bar for some drinks with the Class of  95. Around 10 the downstairs opened and we entered the dark nightclub and helped ourselves to cocktails. I haven't been to a nightclub in years and I kept thinking I should have brought hand sanitizer. I talked to some peeps and then the smoke machine turned on and the dance floor started and that was my cue to head home. I said good bye to some lovely people and headed out into the balmy night, happy to have had an awesome few days.

Saturday morning I woke up surprisingly refreshed and got the Kid ready for a walk with a friend. I strapped him into his stroller and off we went. We stopped at Anker for a chocolate croissant and walked and talked and the Kid was happy as a clam watching the world go by. We stopped at the park so that the Kid could run around and then it was time to head home. I spent the rest of the morning cleaning and doing laundry and doing therapy with the Kid. In the afternoon I decided I needed Dim Sum so I decided to head to the Lily Markt adjacent to the Naschmarkt. Waiting at the light at Wiedner Haupstrasse, I suddenly noticed a couple of motorcycle police waiting at the intersection. Then came the Hells Angels. So many of them. They turned onto Wiedner Hauptstrasse and I would guess there were about 1,000 of them. A hearse followed and then two pick up trucks filled with flowers. It was a pretty surreal thing to see in the middle of Vienna. One friend on Facebook commented that it was like Sons of Anarchy and I responded with something like "If Sons of Anarchy had a chubby Jew in a romper standing in front of a Baroque building rolling her eyes because she just wants to get her damn frozen Dim Sum."... Cough. In the evening we had Dim Sum and then I headed to bed around 9 and dreamt the dream of bbq pork buns.

Sunday morning I took a walk and got the apartment ready for a friend to stop by. Unfortunately her son was sick so we made the joint mom decision that I would head over to her place instead. We had some falafel and hummus and chatted and then I went back home to take the Kid on another neighbourhood walk. I love this bonding time so these walks with him will definitely be a permanent fixture. Once we were back home I put on my make up and dress and heels and it was time for me to head to the Volksoper. A friend has a super awesome contact at the Volksoper so she had great seats. We stopped for some pizza (Office Twin is disappointed in me today) and then made our way to see Graefin Mariza. I have not been to the Volksoper since the 90's so it was definitely nostalgic being back. We took our seats (our awesome awesome seats) and the show began. It was a light hearted operetta and I really enjoyed it! Stay tuned for a summary of the show.

All in all it was a nice weekend but far too short. I wish you the best Monday possible! Maybe start drinking now?

Friday, 26 June 2015

The Not My Class Reunion

Reunions are a funny thing. We are expected to meet up, years after we left an institution we were forced to be in and catch up with people who we haven't seen since we thought that tops with crotch snaps were AWESOME. They are not. They are stupid. Tops with crotch snaps are terrible. I have not been to a reunion before and I still haven't because last night was not my class reunion. As I mentioned in earlier posts, this reunion is for the class of 95. I was the class of 99 but left at the end of tenth grade. I finished my last two years at the American school in Moscow and I loved it. I did not have the best time in Vienna when I was a teenager. I was a teenager and ergo I was angsty. I also was a hopeless romantic and falling in love every 5 minutes and of course it was constant unrequited love because I looked like I look today: hobbit-like.

Since being back in Vienna for the past 11 years, I have had some contact with old friends and only last year, met up with a friend whose sister was in my grade. Over Facebook I have gotten to know some more classmates and bless Facebook for making it easier for me to fulfill my stalking tendencies.

Last night was a meet up for all alumni but it was primarily for the class of 95. I showed up just past 7 and walked into Lukas which used to be the main AIS hang out for all the upper classmen. I was happy to see two people I had had dinner with on Tuesday so I didn't feel the need to stand in the corner and look at Facebook on my phone... stalking people. The bar filled up quickly and it was amazing to see so many familiar faces. But that was one sided. A few people came up to me and had this pained look on their face trying to place me and I quickly blurted out "Class of  99! You don't know me!!! You don't have to hug me!!" One friend suggested I say I was in the 10th grade with them all and see them look guilty for not remembering me. I decided to take it one step further and said that we exchanged friendship bracelets back in 93. Poor nice people being trolled. I probably should have taken it even further than I did by whispering in their ear "I still have your lock of hair." But I strangely showed restraint. I met some lovely people and one woman told me she reads my blog. I always get a thrill when somebody I don't know tells me this. I can see page views and daily they are in the hundreds but I always assume that somebody has stumbled across my site while inadvertently trying to Google a woman in a tubetop gif. Many many drinks were had and it was a fun night but it got late and it was time for me to go home. I decided to walk home in heels which was not by best life choice. But it was a great way to burn off the booze and to think about the evening.

There is something about a reunion that makes you revert to your childhood. Repressed memories and hang ups brim slightly at the surface, and yet, I realized how far I have come as a person. I am happy with who I am and I do love my life. As I wrote on Facebook: It was fun being 14 again for just a night. But I think 34 is far better. I have boobs and a bank account now. The only thing I wish for is that I could go back to me 20 years ago and assure my sad self that things do get better and it doesn't matter if you are popular or not because one day, you will probably end up in a shady bar in beautiful Vienna drinking beer with nice adults who have children and partners and have been through so many life experiences; good and bad. I felt like I got a little bit of closure last night and that was nice. I feel like 2015 is truly shaping up to be a year of tying up loose ends and the start of new things. And of course, in 4 years it will be my 20 year reunion so I should probably start looking into Botox. 

Thursday, 25 June 2015

Random Thoughts

Hello Thursday! It looks like it is going to be a spectacular day! The sun is shining and even though it is stupidly cold for June, it seems like it is going to heat up soon. Tonight I am heading to the Lukas bar for a quasi reunion and that should be fun. Unless I turn into "I carried a watermelon" and end up standing in the corner. Then it won't be a fun night.

I got a decent night's sleep last night and that always revives me and stops me from making bad life choices like: bangs... Today's post is just a collection of random thoughts because why not?

Walks: I love my morning walks. Hopefully I can turn them into morning runs but I lost the running mojo after the Frauenlauf. It will be back but for now, the walks are awesome. I love the city at 5:30 in the morning. It is just starting to wake up on the main streets but the small roads are still sleepy and silent... because it is 5:30 in the morning. I also love that nobody can see me without make up and can't smell my morning breath. I am literally a zombie in a green hoodie, schlepping myself down and up hills. This morning I spied two awesome stickers; one read "Your outfit sucks!" and it was written in a cartoon balloon and I was like "Screw you cartoon balloon. Your outfit sucks!" and I might have said that out loud and again this is why early morning is the best because nobody is around to see me yell at a lamp post. And the other sticker read; "Mustard is the new butter." which, in my opinion, is a pretty divisive statement. Or a philosophical one but I wouldn't know because I am dumb which leads me to my next thought.

Stupidity: Heh. I am a firm believer that intelligence is not always equal to education. I also don't like to call people dumb unless I am talking about their dumb life choices. And while I have a fairly decent education, and I am wellish-read, and I am up-to-date on current events, I can be so very very stupid. One example was a few months ago. Friends were talking about shell suits and I had a completely different image in my mind so instead of staying quiet and googling "shell suits" at a later date, I took it one step further and made lobster claws with my hands and started singing "I'm a clam, I'm a mollusk! La la la!" at which point they stopped and looked at me. I could see first the confusion, then the realization and then the mocking came. OH THE MOCKING! And now to my most recent faux pas... Hedge Fund Managers. Now, for years I have heard this term but usually in a sentence like "Her husband is a hedge fund manager." my dirty mind would briefly grab at something but for the most part, I just thought people were saying that this woman's husband was a gardening enthusiast. And every.single.time I would snort and nod my head condescendingly. Gah. It's a real job. Stupid Tova. Stupid.

Sexism: Coincidentally, a friend just posted a link about sexism on her wall. It's a great cartoon talking about sexual harassment and how men can play a huge role of changing the culture of sexism. I grew up in house where women were equal to men... if not superior. We were expected to do well in school and to be able to debate our opinions with thoughtful arguments and cold hard facts. Funny that when I am losing an argument with the Husband, I often use my biggest weapon: tears. I am a disgrace to my gender. But besides that one little quirk, I am a feminist and I will always be a feminist and when "celebrities" say they are not feminists, I want to scream. But this has all been said before so instead, I will talk about the scene at a paper shop last week. I was standing in line, waiting to purchase stationary and a man in front of me (in his 70s) was buying a pen filler thing for his pen and the two shop assistants (women) were having a hard time figuring out which one fit. I was slightly ticked because this was taking a long time and I just had one thing to purchase and it seemed it would have made good business sense to ring up my transaction quickly and then go back to the pressing matter of filling a pen but whatever. The filler things weren't fitting so the two women called over another shop assistant who was a man. He figured it out quickly and then the customer exclaimed "Ah yes! We needed a man for a man's job!" and then the two women laughed and then I put down my stuff and walked out because I felt I was going to explode. Ugh. This needs to stop! End rant.

The Kid: He is doing so well! Last night we played a game where he had to point back and forth between me and the Husband saying "Mommy!"and "Daddy!" It is amazing to see his development and to see him coming out of his shell. There are little things that I am noticing in him. Now when we take a walk in his stroller he leans forward and points to various things. In the past he would sit in it, almost in a catatonic state. Or now he is constantly looking out the window and making up stories. No idea what he is talking about but he is very very excited. And while I am so excited to see him develop more, I still have my heart broken by mean and/or clueless people. Just the other week someone told me that if they had a son like ours, they would have given him up for adoption. I was devastated and wanted to scream but I didn't. Instead I went home and cried and then cheered myself up by watching Archer. The things people have said to me... unbelievable. But this just makes me stronger and more determined and of course it is going into my book. Turn douchery into cash! Huzzah!

So those are just some random thoughts today. Stay tuned for more stories! And we will see if Baby is put in the corner tonight or if she gets sloppy drunk. How exciting! Happy Thursday!

Wednesday, 24 June 2015

Another Awesome Vienna Night!

I am totally calling this my Gatsby Summer. It isn't even July yet and I feel like I am already having an over-the-top hedonistic summer... and it is AMAZING! I have already written about the great nights I have had the past few weeks and last night was no exception. I met up with some lovely ladies from my alma mater; AIS. One of the woman is someone I have been hanging out with for the past year and a half and the other two were new friends. Actually, one has been a Facebook friend for the past year and she has been an incredible support to me and I know I said it last night while I was half cut, but I will say it again "Thank you." I like how we both remarked that we were exactly online as in real life... which might not be a good thing in my case. #iamhyperactive.

We met at 4 at Schottentor and stopped at Wein and Co. for some wine. I am a slave to Rose on Tuesdays. It's a weird thing, I know. We had a couple of drinks and then headed to ye old faithful Der Fuchs in Die Trauben. Friend used Uber which was absolutely new to me. I like the idea of a driver. And yes, I am a brat. We had another incredible meal and some more drinks and then we decided to head to Cafe Englaender which is slowly becoming my favourite place in Vienna to people watch. I went for the first time a few months back and it just has this amazing vibe. I can't put my finger on it but I can put my finger up to order drinks. Heh.

One friend headed home and the remaining three of us talked about Vienna and New York and I heard some fascinating stories and it was just all around fantastic; filled with laughter. I feel that I have been meeting some incredible and lovely and kind people the last few months and it is amazing! I don't know what has happened but something was dormant inside of me and now it is awakening and I have this new leash on life and this incredible energy and I just feel tingly..and maybe I should lie down. I know that a lot of it has to do with the strides that the Kid is making. A lot has to do with all the amazing experiences I am having and oddly enough I have this strange feeling that something amazing is just around the corner! A new career? Weight loss? Fabulous new shoes? Who knows!!

Today will be a quiet night at home, hanging out with the Kid and making dinner. Tomorrow is a reunion night at Lukas and that should be fun. It will be interesting to see familiar faces from my teenage years even though they will have no clue who I am. The majority are 4 years ahead of me and as I already said, back in school, that was a huge age gap. I know that I have changed since school save for a couple of things; I'm still funny and I am still short and I am still wildly passionate about things. But now I have more confidence in myself (on the inside) and I am not as sensitive.. kind of. My life in Vienna as a teenager wasn't great but my life here as an adult is incredible.

So that's it for now! I will let you know if something amazing happens soon. I'm curious to see if my gut feeling is right or if it just the glasses of rose from last night making me giddy. Or if my gut is eating itself because Office Twin is monitoring my eating habits... Day 3 of captivity. Happy Wednesday!

Monday, 22 June 2015

Dis and Dat

I am still so amazed and so grateful to everybody for yesterday. I still cannot believe so much money was raised. AMAZING! I feel incredibly blessed for having so many awesome friends and this means the world to me! So one more time THANK YOU!!

In other news, this week is gearing up to be a busy one again. No rest for the wicked! Tomorrow night will be a mini AIS reunion - and of course we are going to Der Fuchs und Die Trauben. And on Thursday there is a meet and greet at Lukas. It is not my graduating year so I will only be attending the all age party on Thursday. I am pretty excited to meet up with a Facebook friend who I went to school with but never hung out with. She was 4 years ahead of me and in high school years that is like the age difference between Clooney and that Stacey Kiebler. Snap. I'm a bitch today. Speaking of today, I'm in a funk. Post-fundraiser blues and all that. I am so excited that everything went beyond well but now there is a bit of void now that I am not spending hours planning it. Somebody give me a project, or praise me or pat me on the head and tell me something awesome is about to happen. Sigh.

But today wasn't all bad. Office twin and I have made an arrangement. He is expected to slap food out of my hands if it is junk food. I originally told him to slap me if I am about to eat something bad but he wasn't comfortable with that so now he will just be slapping the food. He did however eat Oreos in front of me which was not the original deal. Office twin is called office twin because we share an office and a birthday and that blew our minds. We bicker like siblings and my favourite past time is trolling him. This morning he made the mistake of calling me pretentious... he is going to get it. We are also enjoying playing "Imaginary Company". This is where we discuss our future marketing firm and come up with great ideas. It would be like Mad Men but without the rampant sexism but with the rampant alcoholism. We would bring back liquid lunches.

We have also come up with the idea that if a client comes in and we think their company goes against any of our morals (i.e. Crocs for me) we would just "boo" them until they would leave. Today we came up with interview questions:
"Where do you see yourself 5 years ago?"
"Do you see yourself as one person or all of us?"
"Use crayons and draw us like one of your French girls." I just added that one tonight because it IS AWESOME! Yeah, this company is so going to happen.

I'm looking forward to hopefully getting some sleep tonight and not waking up cringing thinking I have written something obnoxious in a tipsy state. Restrained I am not. Lots of cringing the last few mornings. Ugh. I'm currently working on a couple of posts and I have an article for Vienna W├╝rstelstand to finish. Otherwise, back to the same old same old. Booooooo.

Sunday, 21 June 2015

Coming Down, Man

I cannot believe how much money was raised!!! 1,500 euros is a lot of money and I cannot believe how incredibly generous everybody has been! I was so touched to see so many friends show up yesterday and I wish I had more hours in the day to spend more time with all of you. The location Adria Wien was absolutely perfect; the service was amazing and the glass house is awesome! Yesterday before the event, I was a nervous wreck. I love organizing events and get togethers and parties but when it comes to the actual day, I get a little stressed. At our second wedding, I couldn't even look up during the vows; so embarrassed was I. While I am an extrovert and am loud and pushy and obnoxious and will demand attention (I'm not above yelling "PAY ATTENTION TO ME!" at the Husband) I actually don't like being the center of attention. Does that make sense? No? Anyway.

Public speaking does not freak me out if I am prepared and talking about something I am an expert in; pizza. But yesterday, the raffle draw freaked me out! I'm a people pleaser so I felt terrible when someone didn't win something. Next year I'm not drawing the numbers, y'all made me nervous!

A friend came back from the event with me last night so that we could order pizza and count the monies. And I was so hopped up on adrenaline that I had to take a walk after. I wish my Fitbit still worked because I am probably hitting 15K daily with all this extra nervous energy. So now it is early morning and I should be sleeping because I went to bed around 11 last night. But no, I have been up since 3:45 because my brain won't turn off. I'm a little worried that I will crash and burn a little now that this event is over. The past two months have been surreal and I have accomplished a lot: Frauenlauf, Eurovision, Fundraiser. So what am I going to do with all this extra energy and time?

I'm not sure but I should probably use the extra time to keep working on my book, maybe try out a few new recipes, bang my head repeatedly against a wall in boredom. Sigh. The good news is that this week I do have some plans: there is an AIS reunion (not my class) and a friend will be in town. And on Wednesday I am going to a BBQ and next Sunday I am heading to the Volksoper so yes, there are things to look forward to. Also, I will have more time to spend with the Kid which is the best part! But yes, I feel like I am about to enter an existential crisis which is so obnoxious of me to even say. Maybe I constantly surround myself with people so that I don't have to actually face the real world. Maybe this is a deep post that I should not be writing at 5 in the morning. And I should really take this time to slow down and get some rest. After my morning walk of course.

I just want to say one more time, thank you so so much!! I am truly truly truly blessed to know so many amazing people! Congratulations to the winners and there are still some prizes that need to be claimed. I will post the winning tickets later this morning on Facebook so take a look when you can. Thank you for all of your donations and prize contributions and for paying attention to me. You all are the best! THANK YOU!