Tova's Recap of Scream
So this film came out in the 90's and I will always remember the first time I watched it. It was in Moscow at a friend's place on the American compound. We rented the VHS at the tiny video store on the compound and then turned her living room into a sleepover haven and ate and screamed and it was amazing. Now, I hate horror films. Hate.them. I hate gore, I hate seeing people in pain and yet... Scream is ok with me... I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I know which parts not to watch. And it has some amazing comedic moments! And a killer (heh) cast: Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, David Arguette, the Fonz, Matthew Lillard and Rose McGowan. I am not putting Skeet Ulrich in that list because homeboy never seemed to have taken a shower in the 90s. So come walk down memory lane with me and yes, caution, spoilers.
We start off with Drew Barrymore (dammit, she goes on the list too) sporting the best hair ever. She is making the popcorn and getting ready for the sex with her boyfriend (I am projecting here but I am assuming that if she is home alone and her football boyfriend is coming by, they ain't playing Monopoly... ifyouknowwhatimean). The phone rings and this is our first clue that shit about to go down.
What started out as a flirtatious phone call (BITCH, PUT DOWN THE PHONE!!) soon turns into a malicious game of Who Wants to be a Millionaire.. but with death and screaming. She is asked horror movie questions. When they ask her if she likes "Scary movies" she should respond with "No.". See, that is what I would have done and the killer would have been all like "Um, so, um, what's your favourite colour?" and then I would have hung up. Suddenly Drew with the great hair realizes that she is dealing with a psychopath and they tell her to turn on the backyard light. Look at that awesome pool! Oh wait, her boyfriend is tied up with duct tape on a chair outside. This cannot be good. They end up killing him in front of her (and I don't watch that part). Now Drew scared, Drew very scared. The killer breaks in and she gets a few kicks in but he gets her and she runs through the yard and is stabbed repeatedly (I don't watch that part). Meanwhile her parents come home to the fire alarm going off and look desperately for her and then they walk outside and see her hanging in the tree and holy shit at 16 this terrified the bejeebus out of me. And little observation here... the parents totally came home early to bust her having the sex with the boyfriend.
We then find ourselves (after dry heaving into a paper bag because of that opening scene) in Sidney Prescott's bedroom. Her boyfriend Billy pulls a Dawson and comes through the window. CREEPER! They make out and he tries to takeittothenextlevel but Sidney is all like I don't see no ring on this finger or something to that effect. We find out that her dad is going out of town (important to the plot) around the 1st anniversary of his wife's/her mother's death YOU HEARTLESS JERK! Sidney promises Billy that he will get some punani one day and he goes off to take a shower.. WASH YOUR HAIR!
Next scene is the school in this affluent Californian town and there are media trucks and people are talking about the murder of two teenagers (because that is kind of a big deal!). Sidney meets up with her friends and these teenagers are definitely acting like complete and utter asses considering that two of their classmates just got butchered. I think my mom would have kept me home. In the group we have: Greasy Billy, Tatum, Tatum's boyfriend Matthew Lillard and Randy (the dorky sidekick who needs a girlfriend). Sidney's friend Tatum (Rose McGowan) tells her she can stay at her place since there is a psychopath running around, killing teenagers. Sidney heads home to her house. Oh, I am sorry... did I say house... I mean DREAM HOUSE! The most amazing house EVER!! LIKE BEAUTIFUL!
Cough, anyway, Sidney waits for her friend Tatum to come and pick her up for the sleepover. She suddenly gets a phone call and it is that damn voice again. Sidney also doesn't sense stranger danger and starts "playing" with the caller. DON'T DO THAT SIDNEY! NO! And then the call gets creepier and BAM! Killer in the closet! There is a chase scene and she runs upstairs to her room and tries to contact 911 on her computer which was just a wild concept back in 96! The future is now, folks. And then suddenly at her window is her boyfriend Billy and she is so happy to see him until a cellphone falls out of his pocket and dun dun duuuunnnn. And since it is a phone from the mid 90's probably made a dent in the floor as well. The police show up as she runs away from Billy and he is arrested and they are all brought to the station. Billy pleads his innocence through his greasy hair but Sidney doesn't believe him. Tatum (her friend and also sister to lovable Deputy Dewey) shows up to take Sidney back home. When they exit the back, they are accosted by Gail Weathers (Courtney Cox). Gail Weathers is Monica Geller in a terrible suit, was the woman who covered Sidney's mom's murder a year ago and still believes the guy who is in prison for the murder is innocent. She gets all up in Sidney's grill and Sidney ends up punching her.
At Tatum's house (Tatum is poor because I am using Sidney's house as a comparison), Sidney gets another call from the killer so this tells us that Billy could quite possibly not be the killer. Yaay! Greasy boyfriend is innocent! At school the next day Sidney bumps into Billy and being the caring and awesome boyfriend that he is, calls her a frigid bitch. Dude. She goes into the bathroom where she overhears two bitchy girls talking about her and the murders and you know that Sidney is having a bad day. Her day just gets worse when the killer in the mask tries to kill her in the bathroom. This is why I hate stalls. I literally will give myself a UTI trying to avoid public bathrooms; risk of disease and/or serial killers. Sidney escapes and that is when the school decides to close down for the day. The principal (Fonzeeeee) also announces that there is a curfew and shows what a dude he is by expelling two assholey kids. Now, as a 16 year old I would not have thought that but now that I am an adult and a mother - expel those douches! So anyway, the Fonz gets it too (I don't watch that part). Not the FONZ!
Because all of the teenagers besides Sidney are a bunch of uncaring jerks; they organize a house party that night. At another amazing house (everybody in this town is rich, besides Tatum. Poor Tatum) the cool kids have their beer and their angst. Sidney shows up and decides that even though her boyfriend is kind of a dick, she will have the sex with him. Meanwhile Tatum goes into the garage to get some beer and dun dun duuunnnn the killer is there. She thinks it is a game and tries to play along. I feel like I need to sit these girls down and tell them that foreplay does not involve scaring the bejeebus out of people. She ends up meeting her maker by getting crushed by the garage door. Ugh. Meanwhile Sidney and Billy are getting ready for the sex. And what is the one rule of a horror film? Virgins don't get killed. NOOO Sidney no! And also, girl, this is your first time and you chose a house party? Your house is empty! Your dad is away! What is wrong with you? Cough.
They do the deed and then the killer comes and stabs Billy (I don't watch that part). Nooo!!! Greasy hair on the fancy carpet! And then I think the cameraman is killed (I don't watch that part), Deputy Dewey gets stabbed and Gail/Monica crashes the car and there is all sorts of chaos. Oh, and at one point Gail/Monica planted a camera in the house so she saw that the killer was there and Randy (a friend I didn't mention before) is unaware that the killer is behind him and GAAH! so much killing. Sidney is running around manically, upset that the guy she just slept with for the first time is dead, she didn't even get a beer and now somebody is trying to kill her and yes, this is a very bad day. After a game of "he's the killer! Not me!" we find out that Billy isn't dead! Oh no, he is very much alive and that means that he is the KILLER! And wait, there's more, Tatum's boyfriend is also the KILLER! THE BIG TWIST. So long story short: Sidney's mom was a bit of a village bicycle: had affairs and ended up sleeping with Billy's dad. Billy's parents divorce and because he apparently has the maturity of a 6 year old, Billy decides to go on a rampage. He enlisted the help of Tatum's boyfriend and they killed Sidney's mother, then spent a year planning a mass killing. And at the end, they would "save" the day! The plan was that Sidney's dad would be the killer who had gone crazy. To make things more realistic, the two guys would have to have stab wounds so then begins one of the weirdest comic moments of the film.
Long story short, they both die with Sidney killing Billy by shooting him in the head (I don't watch that part). Wowza. That was an adrenaline rush. I am not quite sure how teenage me felt about the ending. I think I thought it was AWESOME. And I think I was somewhat smug that I had survived sitting through a horror film. Watching this film as an adult I have to say that I still enjoyed the humor, still was unable to watch the gore and still don't understand the Skeet Ulrich appeal.
So that was my Scream recap... almost 20 years late. I have a few more films to watch to get in da mood for Halloween! And I hope to get in another recap as well. I wish you an awesome Tuesday and tell me what your favourite creepy film is!
We start off with Drew Barrymore (dammit, she goes on the list too) sporting the best hair ever. She is making the popcorn and getting ready for the sex with her boyfriend (I am projecting here but I am assuming that if she is home alone and her football boyfriend is coming by, they ain't playing Monopoly... ifyouknowwhatimean). The phone rings and this is our first clue that shit about to go down.
What started out as a flirtatious phone call (BITCH, PUT DOWN THE PHONE!!) soon turns into a malicious game of Who Wants to be a Millionaire.. but with death and screaming. She is asked horror movie questions. When they ask her if she likes "Scary movies" she should respond with "No.". See, that is what I would have done and the killer would have been all like "Um, so, um, what's your favourite colour?" and then I would have hung up. Suddenly Drew with the great hair realizes that she is dealing with a psychopath and they tell her to turn on the backyard light. Look at that awesome pool! Oh wait, her boyfriend is tied up with duct tape on a chair outside. This cannot be good. They end up killing him in front of her (and I don't watch that part). Now Drew scared, Drew very scared. The killer breaks in and she gets a few kicks in but he gets her and she runs through the yard and is stabbed repeatedly (I don't watch that part). Meanwhile her parents come home to the fire alarm going off and look desperately for her and then they walk outside and see her hanging in the tree and holy shit at 16 this terrified the bejeebus out of me. And little observation here... the parents totally came home early to bust her having the sex with the boyfriend.
We then find ourselves (after dry heaving into a paper bag because of that opening scene) in Sidney Prescott's bedroom. Her boyfriend Billy pulls a Dawson and comes through the window. CREEPER! They make out and he tries to takeittothenextlevel but Sidney is all like I don't see no ring on this finger or something to that effect. We find out that her dad is going out of town (important to the plot) around the 1st anniversary of his wife's/her mother's death YOU HEARTLESS JERK! Sidney promises Billy that he will get some punani one day and he goes off to take a shower.. WASH YOUR HAIR!
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| Dude, for the love of God, wash your hair. Or dry shampoo? That stuff is great! |
Cough, anyway, Sidney waits for her friend Tatum to come and pick her up for the sleepover. She suddenly gets a phone call and it is that damn voice again. Sidney also doesn't sense stranger danger and starts "playing" with the caller. DON'T DO THAT SIDNEY! NO! And then the call gets creepier and BAM! Killer in the closet! There is a chase scene and she runs upstairs to her room and tries to contact 911 on her computer which was just a wild concept back in 96! The future is now, folks. And then suddenly at her window is her boyfriend Billy and she is so happy to see him until a cellphone falls out of his pocket and dun dun duuuunnnn. And since it is a phone from the mid 90's probably made a dent in the floor as well. The police show up as she runs away from Billy and he is arrested and they are all brought to the station. Billy pleads his innocence through his greasy hair but Sidney doesn't believe him. Tatum (her friend and also sister to lovable Deputy Dewey) shows up to take Sidney back home. When they exit the back, they are accosted by Gail Weathers (Courtney Cox). Gail Weathers is Monica Geller in a terrible suit, was the woman who covered Sidney's mom's murder a year ago and still believes the guy who is in prison for the murder is innocent. She gets all up in Sidney's grill and Sidney ends up punching her.
At Tatum's house (Tatum is poor because I am using Sidney's house as a comparison), Sidney gets another call from the killer so this tells us that Billy could quite possibly not be the killer. Yaay! Greasy boyfriend is innocent! At school the next day Sidney bumps into Billy and being the caring and awesome boyfriend that he is, calls her a frigid bitch. Dude. She goes into the bathroom where she overhears two bitchy girls talking about her and the murders and you know that Sidney is having a bad day. Her day just gets worse when the killer in the mask tries to kill her in the bathroom. This is why I hate stalls. I literally will give myself a UTI trying to avoid public bathrooms; risk of disease and/or serial killers. Sidney escapes and that is when the school decides to close down for the day. The principal (Fonzeeeee) also announces that there is a curfew and shows what a dude he is by expelling two assholey kids. Now, as a 16 year old I would not have thought that but now that I am an adult and a mother - expel those douches! So anyway, the Fonz gets it too (I don't watch that part). Not the FONZ!
Because all of the teenagers besides Sidney are a bunch of uncaring jerks; they organize a house party that night. At another amazing house (everybody in this town is rich, besides Tatum. Poor Tatum) the cool kids have their beer and their angst. Sidney shows up and decides that even though her boyfriend is kind of a dick, she will have the sex with him. Meanwhile Tatum goes into the garage to get some beer and dun dun duuunnnn the killer is there. She thinks it is a game and tries to play along. I feel like I need to sit these girls down and tell them that foreplay does not involve scaring the bejeebus out of people. She ends up meeting her maker by getting crushed by the garage door. Ugh. Meanwhile Sidney and Billy are getting ready for the sex. And what is the one rule of a horror film? Virgins don't get killed. NOOO Sidney no! And also, girl, this is your first time and you chose a house party? Your house is empty! Your dad is away! What is wrong with you? Cough.
They do the deed and then the killer comes and stabs Billy (I don't watch that part). Nooo!!! Greasy hair on the fancy carpet! And then I think the cameraman is killed (I don't watch that part), Deputy Dewey gets stabbed and Gail/Monica crashes the car and there is all sorts of chaos. Oh, and at one point Gail/Monica planted a camera in the house so she saw that the killer was there and Randy (a friend I didn't mention before) is unaware that the killer is behind him and GAAH! so much killing. Sidney is running around manically, upset that the guy she just slept with for the first time is dead, she didn't even get a beer and now somebody is trying to kill her and yes, this is a very bad day. After a game of "he's the killer! Not me!" we find out that Billy isn't dead! Oh no, he is very much alive and that means that he is the KILLER! And wait, there's more, Tatum's boyfriend is also the KILLER! THE BIG TWIST. So long story short: Sidney's mom was a bit of a village bicycle: had affairs and ended up sleeping with Billy's dad. Billy's parents divorce and because he apparently has the maturity of a 6 year old, Billy decides to go on a rampage. He enlisted the help of Tatum's boyfriend and they killed Sidney's mother, then spent a year planning a mass killing. And at the end, they would "save" the day! The plan was that Sidney's dad would be the killer who had gone crazy. To make things more realistic, the two guys would have to have stab wounds so then begins one of the weirdest comic moments of the film.
Long story short, they both die with Sidney killing Billy by shooting him in the head (I don't watch that part). Wowza. That was an adrenaline rush. I am not quite sure how teenage me felt about the ending. I think I thought it was AWESOME. And I think I was somewhat smug that I had survived sitting through a horror film. Watching this film as an adult I have to say that I still enjoyed the humor, still was unable to watch the gore and still don't understand the Skeet Ulrich appeal.
So that was my Scream recap... almost 20 years late. I have a few more films to watch to get in da mood for Halloween! And I hope to get in another recap as well. I wish you an awesome Tuesday and tell me what your favourite creepy film is!
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