Lantern Fest

It's a Germanic/Austrian Catholic thing. Every November there is the lantern festival. I remember this from my childhood in Germany and it was awesome. We were given paper lanterns that we had designed and inside was a tea light. Let that sink in for a minute.... Paper, fire, child. Yup. How I did not burst into a fireball is quite incredible...but anyway. Last year the daycare hosted a lantern festival and the Husband and I were like "well, yes, we will attend!". We showed up and there were kids and parents and we were so excited and our kid was all like "Mother, father, daycare? My mind is blown!" and then he ran out of the room to show us how the bathroom light switch worked. Apparently, well. Finally we got him back into the room and the festivities started. His name was called and we pushed him forward and he received his lantern that he had worked on. I don't believe that he was the actual artist because his use of colour was clashy clashy. I also noted that the "wool looked mighty flammable" and I had to quickly remember if I had used hairspray near him in the morning. Roman candle, extraordinaire! Well, no need to have worried because the daycare passed out battery operated tea lights. Of course, the one we received did not work and our prodigal son was pissed. He was having none.of.it. so we ended up leaving early. And I may or may not have blubbered on our way home "I just wanted a nice school event and to see him hold a stupid lantern and waaaaaaaah." I'm chill that way. It was a disappointment but we moved on... Because, we knew there would be another one.


The lantern fest is around Saint Martini Day (the Saint of great drinks) which is November 11. Which happens to be Remembrance Day, Veterans Day and the opening of Vienna ball season. AAAAnd my birthday is on the 11th of February so there is definitely something all magical about the number 11. Spooky.

Anyway, yesterday I left work in a rush and made my way to the Kid's daycare. The event was supposed to start at 3:30 and I really would like to know which parents can make a school event on a Monday at 3:30?!?! Gah! The Husband couldn't make it because he is working on a "serious engineering" project which may or may not involve unicorns. I don't know. I wasn't listening. I got to the daycare just past 4 and ran up the steps and got to the Kid's room and I saw that the door was closed and the lights off and I smiled and crept up to the door thinking I would see a magical glow of lanterns. Zilch. Nada. Room is empty. My child has been kidnapped. I went next door to the other daycare room and the two women that I know gave me a blank stare when I asked where my son was.

Suddenly I felt the room tilt and it was like a bad Lifetime film where people are trying to convince me that I never had a son... dum dum dum duuuum. Until one of the women was like "Oh! You're Raphael's mom! Didn't recognize you with your new hair! He's in the hall downstairs!" Curses! Foiled by my hair again! At this point I was sweating and I walked downstairs to the gym/church hall. I expected to see a line of kids walking and singing about extra-dry martinis but all I saw were mountains of toys, people wrapping boxes of toys and children going ape-shit over the toys. It was some perverse Santa's workshop. I scanned the room for the Kid and saw him on stage (of course), sitting calmly and playing with a toy. He was happy to me see me and the only thing going through my mind was "how the hell am I going to get him to leave that toy here?". And lo and behold, the Kid put down the toy and got off the stage, grabbed my hand and said "AUS!". Which is his version of "Home, James."  One of the daycare providers asked me if I wanted to stay and wrap gifts to which I started snorting. And then I realized she was serious. Instead, I threw money at the problem. I will do whatever it takes to keep the Kid in daycare!

The Kid made our way home and I may or may not have blubbered over the fact that I once again did not see my kid hold a damn lantern. Maybe I'll make my own damn lantern. That's an idea....Happy Martini Day!

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