Bursting with Happiness and What I Find Offensive

Originally this post was just going to about what offends me (and it will be) but there's been a little bit of happiness this morning that just makes me want to draw rainbows and drink light beer.

First off, on the train, I read a story about an Austrian postal worker who has leukemia. She needs a bone marrow transplant. A rep of the Austrian postal service made the news public and so far a total of 13,000 postal workers and their families have donated blood to find a match. If that doesn't make you want to hug someone then you have no soul. What a great story to start the day!

And then, a friend in Texas, an incredibly funny professor, just adopted a German Shepard puppy who had been tragically thrown from a car. When people adopt dogs who have been abandoned, my heart grows two sizes bigger. And the dog is adorable! Fun fact: German Shepards are just called Shepards in German. I know, blew your mind that did.

So I am walking on sunshine but alas, I must write about what offends me. Because, well, sometimes you have to get things off your chest:

Lack of gratitude: if someone does you a favour, you thank them. It is simple. No need to buy them a card or a gift. Just a heartfelt "Thank you" will do. Not that hard.

The term "no offense, but...": I hate this term. I hate it. Why youse gotta say something offensive? Please live by the thought "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." Sure, I applaud honesty and directness, but do it gently and only when asked. This whole "I don't sugarcoat" crap really drives me nuts. Sugarcoat the crap out of it for God's sake. Make it diabetes-inducing! Please don't be a jerk. Life's too short to be mean. Give a person a compliment once in a while. You might just make a difference in their day and who knows, life. Thank you kindergarten boyfriend. You liked my shoes and since then I have such a passion for footwear.

Being mean to people in the service industry: If I were queen, queen of the harpies (and if you don't get that reference, fo' shame), I would make it mandatory for everyone to work at least a couple of days as a server. I did it. I hated it. I was a terrible waitress. But it taught me to be grateful for every other job I have had since then and has given me a greater appreciation for the service industry. I cannot deal with people being rude to staff. It shows such a lack of character, such a disregard for others and probably means that that person has incredibly low self esteem. Don't be rude to servers. They handle your food!!! And don't be rude to your childcare provider i.e. she be watching your kid! Our nanny is like part of our family. Gah! I could go on forever but I won't. This just riles me up.

Crocs: nuff said (I apologize to my friends who have them or have to wear them for medical reasons, but if we meet up in public, you need to walk 50 paces in front or behind me. Sorry, just following the rules). And pssst. I actually borrowed a pair of Croc flip flops to walk through a vineyard the other day, my pretty shoes are now giving me the cold shoulder...the shame

Bigots, racists, anti-semites, homophobes, sexists and so on and so forth: Maybe it is ironic that I tout myself as a feminist and yet I write a blog about turning myself into a hot housewife. But I wouldn't know because I don't know how to use the term 'ironic' properly. I blame Alannis Morisette. Anyway, any of the above people turn me into a raptor and I have to physically remove myself from their presence. Years ago I would be all up in yo face for bigoted comments but now I find that the steely eyed look (don't ask for a picture, you'll turn to stone) and a "I don't agree" said quietly is pretty powerful. When I hear a woman say she isn't a feminist, I want to bash heads. I recently had read an article about feminism and I did the ultimate Internet mistake/black hole sucker of time/make my head explode thing and scrolled down to the comments. One woman, and I'm paraphrasing here, said "I'm a stay at home mom. I don't need feminism. I think it is ugly." Luckily I was able to refrain from commenting to her dumbass comment. If I had had the time or the motivation I would have asked her if she is on crack. Then I would have pointed out that she most likely drives a car (thank you feminism), has the right to vote (thank you feminism), can go anywhere outside of her house unescorted by a male family member (thank you feminism), if God forbid her husband leaves her, she can apply for child and spousal support (thank you feminism), if she has a daughter, her daughter can go to school and pretty much be whatever the hell she wants to be (thank you feminism). Get your facts straight lady. Feminism is for you and for all women. Suck it.

And the final thing that offends me, at this point, is this wedding video. I have linked you to the awesomeness that is the site D'listed. The guy is highlarious!

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