Tova's Viennese ABCs
It is no secret that I love this city. It is the longest that I have lived anywhere in the world and I could not imagine leaving it unless they decide to deport my ass. Of course there are days when I am frustrated. Actually, yesterday when I got home from the Billa on our street, I dropped my groceries on the ground and yelled "DID EVERY OCTOGENARIAN DECIDE TO SHOP AT OUR BILL AT 1:30 TODAY?!?! COME ON!" Literally 15 permed fur clad women descended on the Billa and all wanted to pay with a coupon and in pennies and one forgot her wallet oh wait no she didn't because she remembers talking to her grandson and putting it in her purse and can the cashier please count the 1 million coins she is holding. Thank you. I ranted a little at home and then I felt terrible...And then I murmured "I am not being ageist because I know I will be doing the same thing when I am that age. And just to piss off people, I will try and pay in Monopoly money." So to all you octogenarians at Billa yesterday, I apologize if you felt my rays of rage as I stood behind you in line and tried not to lose my shit.
Anyway, besides the rare annoyance, I have become so used to Vienna and its quirks that I am always surprised when I talk to people who have just moved here and listen to their grievances about service and efficiency. This is also why when I visit North America, I assume Bill the friendly server from Denny's is thinking of using my skull as a hat. Too friendly, too intimate. Just want my eggs over easy, Bill. So, today's post is a bit of a love alphabet about the city I love. This won't be the last alphabet because there are many many many words for the letter K. Enjoy!
A- Is for Almdudler, the cilantro of soft drinks
B- Is for Bim, the nonsensical abbreviation of Strassen Bahn
C- Is for Cafe Hawelka, one of my favourite places in the city to get my stalking on
D- Is for Debutantes, the young women who open the gazillion balls in Vienna
E- Is for Egoist, a surprisingly good song by Falco
F- Is for Falco because yeessss...
G- Is for Gemutlich, the Austrian word for cozy
H- Is for Hundertwasser, the architect that can't build straight floors
I- Is for ice cream shops, the hundreds of which will open in April
J- Is for Jew, this one loves this town
K- Is for Kaiser because Franz Josef was kind of kick ass as far as oppressive monarchs go
L- Is for the Meidlinger L, which brings us back to Falco
M- Is for Mozart because no shit
N- Is for Neubaugasse that smells like Patchouli and expensive felt clothes
O- Is for Opera, because it is the city of... (by the way, where is my Opernball invite?!?)
P- Is for pfiff... the sound you make when you order a too small beer
Q- Is for Quelle, the source of so much awesome water here
R- Is for Ringstrasse beause it is gorgeous
S- Is for Stammtisch because only in Austria is your alcoholism rewarded with a reserved table
T- Is for Titte, the Husband's suggestion because he is a perv
U- Is for Ubahn because the public transportation kicks ass here
V- Is for Vienna because I can't imagine living anywhere else
W- Is for Wien because see V above
X- Is for X-rated, like many of the places along the Gürtel
Y- Is for Yachthäfen on the sea which now belong to Croatia (boom! I'm sorry)
Z- Is for Zither, the instrument played throughout the film The Third Man
So there you have it! Stay tuned for more lists because they are fun. Totes not going to ask the Husband again for a word. First word out of his mouth for the letter "T" was incredibly inappropriate so of course I added it. In a little while I am heading to a friend's for pancakes and I cannot wait! The Kid was up at 6:30 and we snuggled and watched cartoons and I need more coffee. The good news is, is that I am starting to feel a little more human and little less Angel of Death in a bathrobe. If you read yesterday's post, you would know that last night Office Twin came by for dinner. The whole plan was to freak him out with the Downton Abbey decor. He totally trolled me instead: a) he didn't even notice my tiara and b) he went "Aww, look at the effort you made for me" when he saw the set table. No! NO! I told him I was going to hire a server for dinner and he was like, "I would have asked him if he knew about his union rights." Of course. It was a nice dinner and the Kid adored Office Twin: traitor.
I passed out at 9:30 because exhausted. I am hoping that by Wednesday I am back to my energetic self because Mommy's going to Salzburg for one night! Woot! I cannot wait. If you are in Salzburg, let me know. You will probably hear me and my friend laughing and getting lost in the old town before you see us. Tomorrow night a friend is in town and we are going to meet up for dinner and then drinks at, where else, der Fuchs und die Trauben. Tuesday will be a chill day and then on Wednesday morning I will be boarding a train; so very poor man's Anna Karenina. I wish you all a fabulous Sunday and don't forget to check out the guest blog from earlier this morning! Toodles!
Anyway, besides the rare annoyance, I have become so used to Vienna and its quirks that I am always surprised when I talk to people who have just moved here and listen to their grievances about service and efficiency. This is also why when I visit North America, I assume Bill the friendly server from Denny's is thinking of using my skull as a hat. Too friendly, too intimate. Just want my eggs over easy, Bill. So, today's post is a bit of a love alphabet about the city I love. This won't be the last alphabet because there are many many many words for the letter K. Enjoy!
A- Is for Almdudler, the cilantro of soft drinks
B- Is for Bim, the nonsensical abbreviation of Strassen Bahn
C- Is for Cafe Hawelka, one of my favourite places in the city to get my stalking on
D- Is for Debutantes, the young women who open the gazillion balls in Vienna
E- Is for Egoist, a surprisingly good song by Falco
F- Is for Falco because yeessss...
G- Is for Gemutlich, the Austrian word for cozy
H- Is for Hundertwasser, the architect that can't build straight floors
I- Is for ice cream shops, the hundreds of which will open in April
J- Is for Jew, this one loves this town
K- Is for Kaiser because Franz Josef was kind of kick ass as far as oppressive monarchs go
L- Is for the Meidlinger L, which brings us back to Falco
M- Is for Mozart because no shit
N- Is for Neubaugasse that smells like Patchouli and expensive felt clothes
O- Is for Opera, because it is the city of... (by the way, where is my Opernball invite?!?)
P- Is for pfiff... the sound you make when you order a too small beer
Q- Is for Quelle, the source of so much awesome water here
R- Is for Ringstrasse beause it is gorgeous
S- Is for Stammtisch because only in Austria is your alcoholism rewarded with a reserved table
T- Is for Titte, the Husband's suggestion because he is a perv
U- Is for Ubahn because the public transportation kicks ass here
V- Is for Vienna because I can't imagine living anywhere else
W- Is for Wien because see V above
X- Is for X-rated, like many of the places along the Gürtel
Y- Is for Yachthäfen on the sea which now belong to Croatia (boom! I'm sorry)
Z- Is for Zither, the instrument played throughout the film The Third Man
So there you have it! Stay tuned for more lists because they are fun. Totes not going to ask the Husband again for a word. First word out of his mouth for the letter "T" was incredibly inappropriate so of course I added it. In a little while I am heading to a friend's for pancakes and I cannot wait! The Kid was up at 6:30 and we snuggled and watched cartoons and I need more coffee. The good news is, is that I am starting to feel a little more human and little less Angel of Death in a bathrobe. If you read yesterday's post, you would know that last night Office Twin came by for dinner. The whole plan was to freak him out with the Downton Abbey decor. He totally trolled me instead: a) he didn't even notice my tiara and b) he went "Aww, look at the effort you made for me" when he saw the set table. No! NO! I told him I was going to hire a server for dinner and he was like, "I would have asked him if he knew about his union rights." Of course. It was a nice dinner and the Kid adored Office Twin: traitor.
I passed out at 9:30 because exhausted. I am hoping that by Wednesday I am back to my energetic self because Mommy's going to Salzburg for one night! Woot! I cannot wait. If you are in Salzburg, let me know. You will probably hear me and my friend laughing and getting lost in the old town before you see us. Tomorrow night a friend is in town and we are going to meet up for dinner and then drinks at, where else, der Fuchs und die Trauben. Tuesday will be a chill day and then on Wednesday morning I will be boarding a train; so very poor man's Anna Karenina. I wish you all a fabulous Sunday and don't forget to check out the guest blog from earlier this morning! Toodles!
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