Oy Vay, What a Week

I feel like I have been on an emotional roller coaster this week. This is August in Vienna, NOTHING SHOULD BE GOING ON! And yet, I feel like I have been going non-stop with the only thing to show for it is a split lip and regrets. Yay! Sounds like college! Anyway, today's post will be a bit of a re-cap with the hope that the weekend will be a lot better. Fingers crossed!

On Monday, the Kid woke up with another fever and unfortunately I had to go to work. The Nanny assured me he was feeling better by the afternoon but I made the decision to keep him home the next day and really let his cabin fever reach epic heights. In the afternoon, I went to Hawelka to meet a friend and we caught up quickly and then I headed home. It was a quiet night. The next morning I stayed home and he was fit as a fiddle, trying to steal my bras. I don't know why he is obsessed with bras but maybe I should ask my straight male friends? The Nanny came in the afternoon for a couple of hours so I could run some errands; one errand entailed meeting a friend at Cafe Wortner and drinking wine. It was absolutely idyllic sitting under the awning while it rained heavily. And of course I did not bring my umbrella because I like to think that weather forecasts are just for fun. This is why I will most likely end up in a holiday paradise, during hurricane season initially feeling smug for getting such a cheap holiday package. Obviously I will be less smug as I cling to a palm tree, trying not to be blown out to sea.

When I got home, the Kid seemed to be back to his old self and ready to escape the apartment every 30 seconds. Once the Kid was in bed, I decided to stupidly watch romantic/period film trailers (nothing like a good film trailer) and then that lead to watch Anna Karenina and then I was a lost cause. It brought back all the feels and memories of Moscow and tears and I was officially in my funk.

It isn't often that I go into a funk. For the most part I am quite upbeat, carpe diem and all that jazz. But there are days that I get the blues, and Wednesday was one of those days, my friends. With a soppy and sappy and fatalistic blog post about love, I spiraled into a deeper sadness that led to crying in my office over my noodle soup. Ugh. The violins were out that day and in full force. I hate me when I am like this and yet, sometimes I like to feel utterly miserable once in a while because when the good times roll around, the high from that is fantastic. Sometimes you just have to be sad to feel alive. When I was going to therapy, my therapist told me to cry and I was like No! No!! Once I do that, I won't be able to stop. And case in point, the past 6 weeks I have been on and off weepy ever since I had a random cry fest on a night out with friends. Once those water works are tapped, unexpected leaks hit. This is why I don't like to cry! But it is a necessary evil. I hate being a victim and I hate self pity but I know that sometimes I just need to allow myself to be sad once in a while... and then find another project so that I can repress all emotions until I eventually end up in a super market with no pants on, muttering quotes from Jane Austen. After a self-pitying day, I headed to a friend's place to hang out for a little while and hold her newborn twins. ADORABLE! Am I broody? Not really. I always wanted more than 1 child but unfortunately that probably won't happen and I am Ok with that. I can always get a puppy at some point. Preferably a Corgi because they make me laugh and laugh. They just don't make sense with their little stubby legs and ergo I can relate to them.

After my flying visit with my friends and the bebes, I headed to Ulrich for a friend's birthday dinner. I met some lovely ladies, drank too much wine and got home around 12, singing Rock Me Amadeus to myself. The next morning, exhausted, I put on my several sports bras and running gear and headed out into the freezing cold. August, you are drunk, go home. I sweated out most of my sins from the night before, took a shower and saw that the Kid was also in a funk (gets it from his mom, obviously). He cried and apparently ended up crying most of the day. When I got home from work, we had an appointment with his new therapist and about 15 minutes into our session, he lost his ever-loving shit. Now, this was a freak out but it was also triggered by pain. I think his stomach was hurting and since he cannot speak, he can't explain what is happening. It was an EPIC freak out and at one point, he barreled towards me and his knee hit my lip and split it open. First rule of Fight Club. Totally talk about Fight Club. Of course it wasn't his fault and my heart broke for him. The only saving graces when it comes to his freak outs are a) he doesn't try and hurt himself and b) they are so rare nowadays. It has been months since he has had one and usually he is just the most lovable and compliant kid. As he screamed yesterday, the word "Nein" popped up so that's a win! After a suppository, he was able to calm down and this morning, he was all like "Sup?" Luckily once he was calmer, I was able to head to the Therapy Networking Night that I had arranged for Autism in Vienna. I had my phone out just in case I had to rush home and/or if any exciting e-mails, private messages or declarations of adoration came through. The therapist and I made our way to the Beaver Brewing Company and I ordered beer to numb the pain: emotional and physical (Textbook Tova is my new nickname). A new member joined last night and it was fantastic. It is wonderful to meet amazingly inspired and qualified people who are on the same page as I am when it comes to Autism in Austria; i.e. we think the support sucks. After some food and drinks and a great talk, we said our good byes and with the promise of another networking night in September. Yay! I had another small beer at the bar and then headed home, feeling much better than I had earlier in the evening. Thank you beer and grilled cheese.

And now it is Friday; just one more day of work and then the weekend! HOLLA! In a couple of hours I am being interviewed for an article about Canadian politics for a journal. I am definitely nervous because I am not so good talking about stuff I don't know much about. Celebrities? Yes. Shoes? Yes. Designer brands? Totes. Bilateral agreements? Que? Yeah, so wish me luck. Then I will head home and finally put my feet up, maybe go for a run and then watch some mindless TV. Saturday I will aim to do absolutely nothing until I will head to Artis to watch the new Ghostbusters film at 6 with a friend, and then after, meeting friends for a late dinner and drinks. And then, this crazy ass week will finally be officially over. Have a fabulous weekend! Ciao!

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