Adventures in Spray Tanning

I've been using the Gosh self tan mousse and I really like it but before heading to Canada I decided to pay the extra money and get a professional to spray me down. I have only seen things about spray tanning (thank you Toddlers and Tiaras) and have always wanted to try it. After extensive research (I Google Spray tan Vienna and picked the second site to come up) I found a site that offered it. Hard to find in this city actually. I wrote them an email and they responded immediately. Should have been my first clue, actually.

The day came, and I was buffed and hairless and ready to get my spray on. I also wore a strapless bra and granny panties. I went to the address near the centre and rang the bell. The email had explained that they were new and ergo had no sign. Clue, number 2. I walked up the flight of steps and saw that an apartment door was open. I looked in and saw a room with office chairs and laptops. I stepped back in the hallway in confusion. A man stepped out and I said, stupidly, "spray tanning?". He said "oh yes! Come on in!". He led me down the hall and into a room. It had a tripod, black out shutters and oh my God I am going to raped and murdered. He offered me a seat on the "casting" couch and said he would just "phone the guy" who does the spray tanning. Oh my God. I am going to be raped and murdered. Or perhaps photographed in compromising positions.

I texted a friend and explained the situation and asked her not to judge me if in a few months a film comes out named "Tova Does Dallas" because I am, above all, a people pleaser. Ten minutes later my sprayer came in and he was very nice. He spent 10 minutes explaining how he would use my skull as a strainer for pasta self tanning works and what to expect. Then I stepped into the booth and he got the spray gun ready and sprayed me down. He repeated the spraying twice and the effects were instant. For a moment I was disappointed by the results until he suggested I look at my hip by pulling my "clothing" down an inch. Hot Damn! I was tanned! The tan lasted about a week and it didn't get splotchy. I was impressed and although I don't have the time and the money to spend on spray tanning, I have to say it is a good idea for a special event. I also liked that the colour was natural. Not me pictured. So I am glad I got it done but I think I will stick to the at home stuff and avoid anymore situations that could lead to a missing persons report where undoubtedly the husband would pick the worst picture of me ever.