A Day of Suckage and Today of Namaste

I bring you peace and love today.. with a pinch of snark. I have decided to not complain or kvetch today. Yesterday was a shiteous day. I mean absolutely kick me in the chest, drag me down a well and make me listen to Melanie Griffith recite Shakespeare on repeat kind of day. That bad. The morning started off just fine. I was a little sore from the Beyonce dance off I had with myself the night before (wine made me do it). Don't ask, but otherwise things were good. I was looking forward to a short day because in the afternoon was the Kid's annual summer fest. It is the annual kindergarten event and it is a place to be seen. I jest. But it is a fun event. The Husband dropped the Kid off at kindergarten and headed to work. I was already at work. And then around 11, my phone rang and I saw that it was the kindergarten calling and my heart dropped. I picked it up and it was his main provider. She didn't have to say anything because I heard the Kid screaming in the background. She said that he had been screaming for over an hour and if someone could pick him up. The Husband works closer so he went immediately. He texted me when they got home and said the Kid was fine now. I wasn't. I cried and then at 1:15, headed home. The Kid did seem fine and the Husband suggested we try and go to the summer fest. I didn't think this was a good idea but decided to go along and hold the "I was right" card tightly to my chest. We were there for about a good 5 minutes until the Kid got upset again. It was time for us to leave.

He calmed down once he was back home and I headed out to Bipa for supplies and then headed back home. Feeling miserable. The Kid was happy and yet wanted to be held for most of the afternoon. I understood. I wanted to be held too. Lying on the sofa and feeling sorry for the Kid and for myself, I received a message that the exciting event planned for this Friday at lunchtime had to be postponed. It was another kick when I was down. But next week it should be happening so I won't be too down. And Friday afternoon I am meeting a friend for after work drinks so that is something to look forward too. And of course this afternoon, the Husband and I were able to have a quick afternoon date night with pizza and wine). In my dramatic woe is me state, yesterday, I ordered us all pizza, ate too much, and felt worse. I received a few more crappy updates about stuff and ugh, I crawled into bed and turned on my Kindle and read a trashy novel. I was exhausted, my shoulders were killing me and yet I couldn't sleep.

I decided then and there that for the next 24 hours, I was going to be as positive as I could be and find the silver lining of every pile of crap that was being flung my way. And for the most part, it was a decent if not quiet day. So, back to the freak outs. It's hard to always know what triggers them: recently they seem to stem from pain. (We had gone 6 months without one. Those were good months.) We think that he was having joint pain recently but usually they seem to be triggered by digestion. Yesterday truly was my wake up call to take care of this. I have been lax about his diet because I just was overjoyed to see him eating a wider variety of foods. Also, to be completely honest, I am effing tired and the thought of turning into Gywneth Paltrow after a day of work seems exhausting. But after yesterday, I have decided that we are going gluten free this weekend. We can't make the kindergarten go gluten free but we can definitely control what he eats at home. I am cleaning out the pantry this weekend, looking up high fiber, no gluten recipes and then making meal plans. This will be stressful and I am sure he is going to lose his ever loving mind but I know that in the end, this will be worth it. Out of solidarity, I will be going mostly gluten free too because I would feel too guilty otherwise. There have been a lot of studies of gut health and children with autism so this is something I will have to really dedicate myself too. Wish me luck... as wheat pasta is taken out from my tight grasp. Sob.

And since I love to push myself to the limit, I am signing up for 2 months unlimited summer yoga at the Yoga Loft. I feel that if I am going to eat a lot of lentils, I might as well work on my savasana and all that jazz. And so, there you have it. Today continues to be a day of staying positive until about 10 p.m., then I can start to kvetch again... or not. And Namaste, by the way.